can I accept things?

Smua yg terjadi di dunia ini adalah kehendakNya... I heard this saying before, and I continue to say this myself. I say this to make myself stronger when I have to face the unexpected situations, like... kemungkinan mas Yogi pulang ke Indonesia next summer and me being alone in the U.S.
This thing really scares me that I once cried in my sleep.... I have cried over and over since 2 xmas ago and still am crying over the fear of having to be apart from each other.
Walaupun blkgn ini aku slalu bilang ke Mas Yogi that it's ok for me if he must go back to Ind... but is it really the case? can I accept things?? I know whatever happen this summer, pasti Allah SWT tlah mberi yang terbaik bagi kita bdua. I totally realize this..... Tapi apa aku punya kekuatan itu to move on...?????
rasa takut itu trus mhantuiku... Tiap kali aku lihat kalender di kamar mnunjuk tanggal2 akhir bulan, rasa takut itu makin mjadi... I'm afraid to know that the time might be approching slowly....
Tiap kali, we come across this discussion, my heart is torn into pieces. Without realizing sometimes I started crying... I know that I must face the condition with a strong heart and a big smile.
Ya Allah, aku minta yang terbaik bagi kamu b2. kuatkanlah hati kami b2... Aku tahu hanya Engkau yg tahu apa yg tbaik bagi kami and please bless us with that... Amin...